In Praise Of The Sweatpants Vacation
It is important to realize there are different types of vacations. On one end are the vacations for exploring and expanding one’s horizons…the ones which illicit “ooh’s” and “aah’s” from others. And at the other end are those that are like coming home at the end of the day and putting on your coziest sweatpants; you know, the ones you only wear when you are done trying to impress anyone and desire only comfort and relaxation.
Embracing the Sweatpants Vacation
I was on vacation for the last two weeks in upstate New York, two miles down a dirt road, on the shores of Lake Champlain. A place where the nearest grocery store is 15 minutes away and you can see every star because there is no ambient light. It is the epitome of being off the grid.
We make a trek to this special place every summer and it is the place I most associate with relaxation. Our days are filled with walks down to the lake to jump in, go tubing and waterskiing, or paddle boarding. In between, are all out games of ping pong (I have yet to win) and a porch full of Adirondack chairs which beckon you to grab a book and read for a while.
I was settling in to one of these chairs on my first afternoon, excited to dive into the latest in my favorite spy series, when I had a realization. I was tired of self-improvement, optimization, and striving to make the most of things. I was tired of opening my email and seeing yet another post on how to optimize my nutrition, sleep, be a better parent, work smarter, etc., I realized I had had enough. I needed a break!
I decided then and there my motto for this vacation would be, “Just say no…to self-improvement.”
I laughed to myself as I made this inner proclamation, as I love the topic of self-improvement. I am not sure I can fully put my finger on it, but it probably has something to do with my ongoing struggle with success and ambition. But this realization made me step back and admit we all probably need the occasional break from the relentless drive to improve, from striving toward our goals, from working toward our aspirational selves. And candidly, by midlife, I have earned the right to hit pause from time to time and just…be.
In Praise of the Non-optimized Life
Going back to my book, I look forward every July to reading the latest in the Gabriel Allon spy series by Daniel Silva. It is completely escapist and the best company. Who cares how well it is written (good enough) or what I am learning from it (irrelevant, it’s a great story). All I know is when reading one of these books I lose track of time and where I am.
Moderation? Subscribing to “the early bird gets the worm”? I think not. I look forward to having that second glass of wine and not worrying about how it will impact my sleep because I can take a nap the next day. Furthermore, I am not going to set an alarm or get up early in order to maximize my day. I will let my day unfold as it will, with activities determined by the weather and what I feel like, not a list of sights to be checked off some list.
And my email, nope, not going to check it every day. At the moment there is nothing in my life which is so pressing I have to be available 24/7.
We all need a break from the endless to-do lists which are the master of our days. We need chunks of time where life slows down, and we are not at everyone’s beck and call. Where joy and pleasure come from the simple things in life, like looking across the lake at the multi-hued purple mountains as the sun sets, or seeing the first firefly of the evening, or waking to a clap of thunder and flash of lightening followed by the furious drumming of thousands of raindrops as the heavens unleash a torrent of rain.
The sweatpants vacation is about simplicity, freedom from expectation, and just “being.” And you will know you have been successful when you drift off to sleep and think to yourself, “What a glorious day. I did not really “do” anything.”
Parting Thought
One of the magical aspects of going to the same place each summer is that I am not trying to optimize my time there as I know I will be back next summer, and whatever I miss I can do next year…or maybe not.
To be continued…
