Take Back Control Of Your Life

By midlife we have a better sense of who we are, but this does not always translate into knowing what we want or how to get it. Sometimes we are stuck in patterns of action which might have served us well in the past, but which can hold us back going forward. I know this was the case for me.

Today I’m excited to share Part 1 of my conversation with Bella Dodds, a Holistic Health and Stress Coach. I have worked with Bella over the last 4 years to reduce the stress in my life, recover from burnout, gain greater clarity about my future, and to define a greater sense of purpose in my life. She is fantastic and my work with her as been transformational.

Bella has developed a process which is straightforward, approachable, and highly effective. It can be used by anyone who wants to have more control over their lives, find greater happiness and peace, and to fully realize their value.

Karyn: You just wrote a new book, Anchoring into Grace. What led you to write this book?

Bella:  I wrote the book for 2 reasons.

First, over the past ten years, I have developed a clear and effective approach to addressing acute and chronic stress which I wanted to share with more people. I have seen my clients have many ah-ha moments which have allowed them to heal themselves and change their lives in profound and meaningful ways.

Second, with my book I hope to help more people learn how strengthen their ability to activate and connect on a regular basis to the healing energy inside themselves.

My research is specifically designed to help people up-level how to meet chaotic challenges like the pandemic. It also helps people avoid working against themselves in ways they may not realize.

Karyn: What is the significance of the title of the book?

Bella: The title points to the depth and beauty which arises when we anchor within ourselves and tap into an ever-present and always available source of peace. When we anchor into this healing source throughout our day, and strengthen our ability to do this, we can replenish our energy reserves and calm our minds as we go about our busy lives.

The title also points to doing the opposite of anchoring ourselves in the external world first. When we do this, we anchor ourselves in the unpredictability and uncertainty of the world around us. This puts us in a vulnerable, precarious position.

My approach is different from a mindfulness practice. It first focuses on how to work in harmony with your survival program, so you can reverse your overactive stress response and be calmer and more resilient in your everyday life. This inside out approach also enables you to have greater fortitude amidst the global challenges which are increasingly becoming more impactful on a personal level.

Yes, we need to make sure we stay on top of our responsibilities. Yes, we need to be organized and focused. Yes, we need to show up and do our best for our loved ones. But if we are putting 99% of our focus on the external world and need everything to be a certain way for us to feel okay, then we will be at the mercy of everything and everyone. The end result? We pay a heavy price which often catches up with us, especially in mid-life.

Karyn: What is Anchoring into Grace about at the highest level?

Bella: I am seeking to address chronic stress from a midbody, evolutionary point of view. The pace and intensity of 21st century life is demanding we evolve. It is important to teach our nervous systems, minds, and emotions how to evolve to meet these increased demands.

It is important to understand our bodies are made up of a highly complex, intercellular system of over 50 trillion cells. And these individual cells have evolved over hundreds of millions of years to work together in harmony to keep us alive. If we want to be calmer in a chaotic world, then we need to not only teach our minds how to do this, but our bodies as well.

If we try to live as though it were still the 20th century – we’re probably going to feel burned-out and exhausted a lot of the time. And I say this slightly in jest, but not really. Our world has dramatically changed in the last twenty years due to this new, interconnected technology.

But none of us got a download or a personal update teaching our minds and nervous systems how to effectively process the fire hydrant of information coming at us. We must learn how to up-level how we process our fast-paced, intense world.

And on top of this, we're dealing with a pandemic, the war in the Ukraine, the climate crisis, and growing political strife. In addition, our kids are struggling underneath this compounding pressure and many parents (especially women) are dealing with a myriad of health problems like chronic fatigue, brain fog, anxiety, depression...it's a lot.

Karyn: Can you talk about the Anchoring into Grace process in the book?

Bella: The book is divided into 2 parts. The first part helps people understand how they are working against themselves in ways they may not realize. It then helps them see changes they can make to manage their work/life demands far more effectively. The second part teaches the reader how to access higher levels of peace more often throughout the day so that they can be calmer and more resilient.

I start by helping people clearly understand the deeper reasons why they are experiencing relentless stress or tension just going about their daily lives. The cost of chronic stress is pervasive and can greatly corrode our relationship with our partners, our kids, our effectiveness in juggling our many roles and responsibilities, and how confident we feel about ourselves. Not to mention stress can compromise our physical health and our immune system.

In my book, I seek to solve this pervasive problem by addressing the root issue. Then I guide and teach the reader how to make specific adjustments. For example, it can be painful when your kids are struggling or your partner is always mad at you, all while you are literally giving it everything you’ve got to hold it all together. Yet it is still somehow not enough.

This surface pain can be devastating. But underneath all of it, there is a reason why your best efforts aren’t working. And once you see it - it’s obvious. But first you must clearly understand the problem to solve it. Then people can address the root issue to not only get better results in their lives using less effort, but equally how to have a more rewarding, peaceful, and enjoyable life too.

Karyn: What have your clients and readers found to be most powerful about the Anchoring into Grace practice?

Bella: The healing they experience when they understand that some of the deepest pain and challenges in their past gave birth to some of their most impressive strengths in life. When individuals come to this deeper understanding, I’ve witnessed my clients experience an authentic level of gratitude which releases them from decades of past resentments. And they gain new insights into their lives which have been invaluable.

This may be difficult to fully understand until you experience it for yourself and know it to be true. But I say this with humility, within our greatest pain exists an intertwinement to what we love and value the most in our lives. When our minds see this interconnection of cause and effect, we can heal and change our lives in profound and meaningful ways.

Coaching at the midbody level helps our nervous system evolve out of survival mode. No longer must we constantly battle with our high blood pressure, elevated heart rate, or blood sugar levels spiking throughout the day by non-life-threatening situations. This is an exhausting, unhealthy, and painful way to live.

Parting Thought

I can’t recommend Bella and her process enough and next week we will continue our conversation. If what we have discussed resonates, you can email her through her website, belladodds.com, or call her at: 303-390-0702 to set up a complimentary consultation. In addition to her book, Anchoring Into Grace, she is starting a podcast in April: How to Be Calm in a Chaotic World. Both can be found on her website.

You can also connect with her on Instagram at: @belladodds and Facebook @belladodds.

See you next week…