Gratitude For Gratitude
One 2-minute gratitude ritual has transformed my life over the last year. I only wish I had understood sooner gratitude is more than saying thank you or appreciating when someone does something for you. Learning how to incorporate a 2-3 minute gratitude practice into each day has made me fundamentally happier, more content and more grounded.
So, why is gratitude so powerful?
“Research has shown that gratitude can improve general well-being, increase resilience, strengthen social relationships, and reduce stress and depression. The more grateful people are, the greater their overall well-being and life satisfaction. Grateful people also have a greater capacity for joy and positive emotions.”
A greater sense of well-being and life satisfaction are the antidote to the discontent which can creep up during midlife. Embrace gratitude and you will have a powerful weapon at your side on your journey.
I was awakened to the deep power of gratitude through 45 Days to Awakening, a 6-week scientifically proven program for finding lasting inner peace and contentment. Each morning and evening as part of the program, I was asked to complete a set of positive psychology exercises, including one on gratitude. I found the gratitude exercise transformative and knew I had to continue.
My Gratitude Ritual
My gratitude practice is the foundation of my day. I do it when I wake up, often before I open my eyes. These 2-3 minutes are essential to beginning each day grounded, centered and positive.
My practice has 2 parts, beginning with an intention for my life. I say to myself, “I want to live a life of love, gratitude, purpose, prosperity, peace, joy, and happiness, while in a state of flow.” Following this, I list 3 items I am grateful for on this day and 3 additional universal items. For example, today’s list included I get to see my son graduate from high school, I have 4 hours of uninterrupted time to work on Holos and I get to have lunch with a friend I have not seen in months. In addition, I am grateful summer is here, to have all my boys back together, and to ride my bike again after my surgeries.
I have 2 rules. I cannot repeat something from the day before and I must be specific. I often list more than 3 items for each category because once I get going it feels so good!
Without doubt my gratitude practice helps me find joy, peace, love, and happiness in my day-to-day life.
The Other Side of Discontent
My journey through midlife has had unexpected moments of discontent. I have sometimes found I no longer find joy, happiness, and fulfillment in the same people, activities, and situations as I have in the past. This can leave me feeling restless, aimless, and unfulfilled…not at all how I want to feel!
It is in these moments I notice the power of my daily gratitude practice. Daily gratitude demands I take an honest look at my life. It asks me to notice, honor and not take for granted the people, activities, and parts of my life which still bring me incredible meaning and joy.
I have also noted a few other ways that practicing gratitude has improved my life.
Gratitude primes my brain to notice the positive. It is too easy to notice only the squeaky wheel, what is not working or the challenges in life. Now I choose to focus on all I am grateful for in my life. As a result, I have a more positive mindset.
Gratitude gives me perspective and helps me be less reactive. For example, I understand the occasional times of tension with my 18-year-old as the normal conflict between my desire for control and his desire to leave the nest. Focusing on what I am grateful for about him, his strength and courage, puts my anger and frustration in perspective.
Gratitude helps me live in the moment. Instead of worrying unnecessarily about where we will live once the kids are out of the house (in my case this does not need addressed for at least 6 years), I focus on the benefits of living in Marin: the weather and easy access to trails which makes being outdoors possible all year.
Gratitude makes me more resilient. It reminds me of the people I love, who are my anchors. It helps me not stress the little annoyances and better handle the big stresses.
Gratitude also helps me show up as the best version of myself. I am kinder and more compassionate. I am more inclined to see the best in people (I am sure my husband appreciates this) and situations.
Simply, gratitude makes me a happier person and my daily practice brings me one step closer to living the life I desire.
And if this doesn’t convince you, an article in PositivePsychology.com points to research illustrating the benefits of gratitude for better sleep, for making you feel better when expressing and receiving gratitude, for reducing pain and strengthening social ties. “Even a simple gratitude practice builds lasting neural sensitivity to more positive thinking.”
Why not give it a try? I have no doubt you will end up with a more positive outlook and who does not want more positivity in their life?
Other Ways to Practice Gratitude
There are many ways to practice gratitude. For each be specific and go for depth (specific detail) rather than superficial breadth. You can keep a gratitude journal and write down 3-5 items you are grateful for each morning or evening. The bonus of doing this at night is apparently “hypothalamic regulation triggered by gratitude helps us get deeper and healthier sleep!” You can easily involve your kids. Each night at dinner I ask everyone to share 2 pieces of their day for which they are grateful. Full candor, this was initially painful, as getting 3 boys onboard took patience. You also can write letters of gratitude to people in your life or tell them regularly what you appreciate about them. You can read this short article for other ideas and approaches.
Parting Thought
As I wrote this, I reflected on how grateful I am to live in this moment in time. When it is so easy, thanks to technology, to share my love of health & wellness, longevity, and purposeful living with a community of like-minded women.
See you next week…
